Welcome to Surviving Therapist Abuse. My intention in starting this blog is twofold: first, to bring awareness and attention to the issues of therapist-patient abuse and exploitation in particular, and abuse by healing professionals in general; second, to provide resources for those who may need help or support. As a survivor of therapist abuse, I have a keen interest in the healing and recovery process, and I expect that will be a common topic in my posts as well.
I am neither psychologist nor lawyer, so what you read here are simply my thoughts and opinions.
Thanks for stopping by!
~Kristi
Greetings,
This is an important topic especially to show people that they are not alone. I think of how dependent I have been on therapists and how it feels when something inappropriate happens in our meetings, it is painful. I usually flee. Now I will talk about it but fortunately, nothing has happened lately that I need to confront.
Because I didn’t get good or no parenting as a kid, it is vital to have a therapist with good boundary skills as well as caring.
All the best with this blog, Moria
Thanks for your support!
I agree that having a therapist with good boundaries is vitally important, especially when we ourselves did not learn how to have good boundaries when we were growing up. For whatever reason, some of us missed out on having that modeled for us. It’s never too late to develop good boundaries! In the past couple of years, I’ve grown boundaries that I never had before.
Even a good therapist can forget how much influence they can have over a patient. It’s really important that they stay conscious of their actions and communications, and also not introduce too much about themselves and their own needs into the therapy relationship. And when a boundary gets pushed, it’s important to address it openly as soon as possible, get it out on the table. Awareness, I believe, is the key to learning, growing and healing.
This is a great topic that I plan to write more about. Thanks for bringing it up!
It surely takes time to build that boundary/awareness muscle because each of us is reinventing the wheel so good models and good support are crucial. It’s important to be kind with oneself through the growing process – don’t need more bad parenting that was planted in us.
It’s true about the therapist not talking about themselves. A good key to evaluating a therapist is to make sure they’re not doing it apart from ‘how are you’, ‘I’m fine’.
I agree.
I didn’t always like the “blank slate” that some therapists offer — it’s weird to not know anything about your therapist — but now I value it much more. It keeps things clean and straightforward. I also really appreciate it when a therapist — or anyone, really — asks me if I want their opinion or suggestions, or checks in with me about whether or not their sharing something about themselves would be helpful. That gives me the opportunity of checking in with myself and deciding “yes” or “no.” It’s not up to someone else to decide what I need or what’s best for me.