Hello. my name is Maria and I am a survivor too. You may have noticed some of my posts in the past couple of months. I have shared my story with Kristi and she has graciously posted it here on her site.
It is a longer story as part of the story is more about what I learned about sexual assault in the context of helping relationships. In fact as I just wrote “sexual assault” I still feel that I am exegerating and that exploitation somehow sounds better. I wasn’t a willing or consenting party to what happened, but somehow it is still hard for me to say those words.
I am still on the road to recovery. From what I have heard from others who have been put on this journey by exploitive therapists and other helping professionals is that the journey is more than likely a life long journey with new insights and understandings along the way. What happened is life altering. It’s been hard to accept that as well as to accept the psychiatrist I loved and in some manner still do is not the person he pretends to be at all. That he continues to lie and gaslight me by not taking responsibility has been the hardest thing to face in the healing process.
But as Kristi has said in her writings here, no matter your feelings please think of not only getting out of the relationship but also about reporting them to their board, the police, or to a sexual assault advocate in your area who can assist you in the reporting options including the option of not reporting.
I hope you read my story. Please feel free to comment and I hope you find my journey helpful for yours. Remember you are strong and courageous even if the therapist is not held accountable. It takes a lot of strength to break the silence.
You can find my story on the Your Stories page or by clicking here.
Thank you Maria for having the courage to speak out. We all need that courage, that voice. I used to think I was so alone, and then I found out that these Thera-ra-pists and Thera-pricks are not alone in their mechanisms, manners, and manipulations. Finding out I was not alone, was life changing. It is important to find others that have experienced similar as it helps us step out from the fog. One step at a time, we see more clearly and reclaim our lives. It’s the ultimate therapy, just not what initially we thought we were paying for.
Thank you.
Thank you for your response. I agree someone once said the best way we get “revenge” is by living OUR lives. Yes a life well lived is what we reclaim. It can be hard to get ourselves out of hole because that is why we went to the therapist in the first place. I have reflected on how this experience also has exposed a lot of other shadows I need to address as well. It is not a silver lining or anything like that but I do have the opportunity to do and be things I was setting aside while taking care of his needs.
I too believe much has changed since the 1990s, when I and others educated people about the egregious problem of therapist sexual abuse.
I will be providing a program for the American Psychological Associations annual convention in San Francisco this August 9, 2018, which will try to address this problem and the concerns you raise. I would like to dialogue some more about how the Licensing Boards seem to be changing their attitudes to no longer seeing therapist sexual misconduct/abuse as a priority . If anyone is interested and if I can be helpful let me know.
How wonderful that you are addressing this issue. Please feel free to email me at mariaanna4103@gmail. We could set up a time to talk if you like before your presentation. I addressed this issue at a national conference last year. There were a few therapists there from California. I hope it goes well and many attend your session(s).
Hi Maria
The program went well. I will be conducting a workshop for Psychologists on this same issue in MA in November.
Yes, let’s talk before my next program.
Regards